cac4, That's basically what I went through for the past 4 years...I convinced myself that I would rather not mess with sex. Guess what....it doesn't work...eventually you go freaking nuts and end up rationalizing the idea of an affair, then you freak out, read some books, then start posting messages here because you were too quiet to make a stink early on.
Here's my metaphor of the day....
Suppose your relationship is like 5-time Tour De France winner Lance Armstrong, you notice that one of your nuts is swollen (a desire deficiency)...a seemingly minor, irritating problem. Compared to the strength of the rest of the body, this is of minor significance because it's a slight pain and you can ignore because you are tough. Then one day, it gets too painful to ride your bike anymore...the little swolen nut is crippling the entire body. So you go to find out what the problem is and while you might think that simply fixing the nut will solve everything, you discover that it represents an even bigger problem (in his case cancer) that will kill the whole body if its ignored. So now it requires looking at the entire body and figuring out if the cancer has spread to other areas. You begin treatments which make you even sicker but you really want to live so you keep fighting.
