need to GAL

[FunDad]

I'm so sorry. Your man is being immature and selfish, and unfortunately it sounds like he has your soft heart completely bound up in all this. Bottom line: If you want change, you can NOT let him have the best of both worlds (You and the life he is hiding). Why would he give up anything? It's going to take strength, determination, and courage. I'm so so so sorry. I tear up everytime I see someone having to start this, cause it's so painful, tormenting, and hard to detach, but for your own sanity and well being you MUST. I guess at least you are getting sex still, but really it's not worth it in the long run because relationships are much more than that - unless that's all you want from him (fwb?). Do you really feel safe with this guy? Do you feel yourself turning into a control freak?
You can't let him own your mind like the way he does now. I made the mistake of turning too much of my well being over to my spouse, and she trounced it. I know it's hard, so hard. Keep reading the stories here. Be patient. You will grow stronger and wiser.