I felt that H's relationships with his kids and ex were big red flags - sure, he had explanations for them, but they may look a little different in the light of current events.
And your SD knows about the multiples, it may not be long before your kids do too.
Understanding about his depression and trying to wait it out is one thing, but make sure you have some healthy boundaries - your past history suggests you may have issues in that department, and "standing" is not always the best option for people whose histories suggests codependent behaviors. Plus, you CAN stand OUTSIDE a marriage.
If it's financially better for you to remain legally married, I respect that - but make sure you aren';t just leaving yourself open to liability for unpaid debts or taxes that H may accumulate in his illness.
