Heather, since you are "moving upward and onward", this has to have Smokey a bit stirred up. From what I've read, they want us to stay where we are, and not be happy, not move forward....be miserable.... And you're not doing that. Seems his antenna is up wondering what's going on, and why aren't you unhappy like him.
I agree with your atty. D12 is used to "the new normal". My S16 has Asperger's, too . (Don't think I shared that before, but hasn't been relevant either). Our move away from his dad removed so much stress from his life. It was the best thing we ever did.
Smokey may seem relieved.... But remember to believe none of what they say.