still holding on - 4

[u-turn]

I have read and feel like even though the transparency is wanted by me, it has to come from her (and may help her kick the addiction in a so to speak).

I actually think that it would be mostly symbolic in our case, as anything can be hidden and I cannot have access to her work e-mail or phone (and anything can be deleted or hidden). So it is symbolic in a way that she would be offering as much as she can - I would either have to accept what she's offering or not. I have told her a thousand times that she doesn't need to lie to me. We are adults, tell me the truth and let us both make the decisions that need to be made. (It hasn't always happened that way)

But what I do know is that there usually is depression, melancholy, stress, etc. and I'm keeping an eye out for those behaviors as my sign something is afoot in her other relationship.

I have seen those things come and go - I have reacted to them in the past and still find myself doing that - as you can see from my posts. I try to give time and space so I can evaluated things from a distance and not react to every change. Though with this new pattern, I am thrown a little.

Keep it up Bart!!