Dealing with WAW part 6

[25yearsmlc]

Ok, so I met W and the kiddos up at the YMCA about 30 minutes before the coaches meeting. S3 went right into the kiddie room. We walked S5 to the kidzone where he likes to play. After getting him checked in, we went outside and chatted about nothing really for about 20 minutes. It was all upbeat, happy, I had a big smile and PMA the entire time. It was relaxed conversation, just not about anything in particular...not that there is anything wrong with that

Turns out W wanted to work out while we were up there so that is why she did not want to eat. Turns out we could use our discount at the sporting goods place today (I got something there earlier, and they were noticeably in short supply of kids soccer stuff) so I suggested we go back up there after the meeting was over. She seemed semi reluctant as she wanted to have the kids in bed by 8, but she said ok. We went up there, and it was a hurried, but ok time. We got both kids all the stuff they needed, and they were really happy to get new soccer stuff. Walked them out to her car, put them in, said good bye to the kiddos.

So, "TURNS OUT" your gut was way off....right? She had a boring but valid reason for what she said and it meant Nothing about an OM.

To me this is a teachable moment I hope you won't ignore...


I actually initiated a hug on her and she was receptive.

okay but why? I'm a bit fuzzy about where we are with this pursuit versus showing her indifference but isn't a hug you initiate, Not so great an idea? Thank God she was receptive or you'd be spinning. Now, expect some pull back from her b/c she won't want you to "assume".

And please don't forget how you pushed for the divorce, a lot, and you can't really say you "took it back," b/c you SAID you wanted to.
...

Somehow it came up about when I was to get the kids back. I said I would get them Sunday morning to take them out on the boat. She said she thought I was going to get them Saturday afternoon. I said nah. She told me she was going to be working for her aunt on Sunday down at the beach near where I am, so I figure she will be driving them here in the morning. Knowing she already said she would be working, I suggested she come boating with us.

I'm confused. You invited her knowing she could not accept and if she really wanted to, she'd have to change around a bunch of arrangements and leave her aunt in the lurch? But is it that you just wanted her to know you were not going to have another woman with you again? IS that your reasoning? Geez, you do spend energy on manipulating outcomes...do you see all the maneuvering here?

I don't know that it's "wrong", per se. It just strikes me as not really authentic or too gamey. I could be wrong. Just a GUT thing.



I told her where we would be going (a really fun beach/bar/restaurant area) where you can pull the boat up to and hang out in the water and drink bushwhackers (this place is home of the Bushwhacker Festival). I spent a lot of time up there in my single days in my boat! She looked interested, but did not say anything one way or the other. I fully expect her not to, as she is working.

how could she accept then and there even if she wanted to?


Mostly did it to alleviate any concerns she may have that I might be going with LF. Who knows...maybe she will end up wanting to go and work it out where she can.

Really??

Funny thing about LF I thought of today. A month or so ago when I went to the beach with LF, we bought mich ultra beers for the beach. NOT my beer of choice, but hers. Well, a week or so later, I went to the beach with W, and when she went to get a beer out of the cooler, I had a bunch of the ultras in there. She asked me why I had those. Only struck me as funny now that she would ask. Is that one of those things a girl notices?

I'm afraid to say "yes" b/c I think you'll start putting ultra mich's all around. What did you say to her?

BTW, What was the LF doing in your boat? If the situation were reversed, and she had OM in a boat driving around and had "his" beer still there, you would assume it was a date, like the rest of the world would assume...

Anyhow, yes i would notice that if it were me, b/c I do drink that beer, and my h and son27 scoff at it.