If it were me, continued contact with OM would be a dealbreaker. It was in my sitch, and you have said it is likewise with you.
If it were me, I would (and did, in my sitch) insist upon a no-contact letter being sent and full transparency from my wife in order to verify no-contact and to rebuild trust as we pieced. You have said likewise with you, and in fact communicated to your wife that you NEEDED that.
She's done nothing in that regard.
You put it all off until your MC appt., and then never addressed it.
Now you're asking us why you shouldn't pursue your wife.
Can you see why I say no? If you were your wife, what message would you receive from all of the above?
