still holding on - 4

[u-turn]

So the pursuit continues by her. It's like she is a different person - just like that.

She tells me where she is going, she hugs and kisses me good bye, she holds my hand every night. It's a little confusing to me how she can change so quickly. So it makes me cautious with my actions and what I say to her.

She has even told me of different job opportunities that she may be going after (which would be at a different facility than OM).

Now all this could be real or a full-on cover-up, I want to trust this, but don't know how. I want to ask her if this is all real, but don't want to push too hard or stop it - if it actually is real.

hoping for some insight again - thank you!!

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Just adding to something I wrote earlier - hoping to get some insight>

She is pursuing me now and I am trying to make my detachment keep me strong. I don't want to just be drawn back in and it all start over again.

I wonder if this pursuit is from actual feelings or covering for something else. She has reached over and held my hand in the middle of the night, and wanted long hugs - I didn't ask for these things and didn't need them (thought they do make me momentarily feel better). I have a hard time believing that what I said the other day made a quick change or any change in her. I believe I am detached in a way that I can look at this behavior and question it to myself. But I am questioning it out loud here. (is it helping her or is she doing it for me?)

I have read about the pursuer.... cycle (but cannot find anything on that now). When I read it before, it described what I think is happening with me. I tend to rush back and ruin progress.

Anyone know about how an A dies on its own - cold turkey end vs. slowly fizzling out to nothing? and signs of either?