Have you ever asked him why he needs to know your every move away from the home? It sounds to me like he's jealous of you and wants you to be as miserable as he is, i.e., staying at home and not out enjoying yourself. He also doesn't want to you move forward and leave him behind and yet he isn't willing to participate in anything w/you. The next time he inquires as to what you are doing or where you are going, turn around and ask him why he needs to know. It will throw him off balance and he'll have to back peddle w/a response. Time to throw him some curve balls.
As for an apology, I don't think you are going to get one unless you push the issue. He's swept it under the rug and thinks you have too. At some point, you are going to have to decide when you want to have a talk w/him and find out where he's at for the moment. Now, if you do this, remain calm, keep your voice calm and level, but watch his body language. Also, keep in mind you may not get the answers you are looking for, but you will know if he's still bouncing off the walls and coming up w/irrational stuff.
It's tough having them at home, but at some point, you will know when you've had enough and are ready to do something about it.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
