WAH - Chapter 4 Lisa B

[pilot]

Lisa,

Remember, your H HAS to say those things about OW to justify what he has done. Do you really think he would say to his friend "My W is much hotter, prettier, smarter, etc, than OW, but I decided to drop it down a notch because I got disillusioned?" Of course not. He has to justify to his friends, and more importantly, himself that what he did was right. He clearly is having second thoughts. I promise you that. His relationship with OW is on the way out. So who cares how great H makes OW out to be, truth of the matter is OW does not want your H. It will only be a matter of time before OW is on the receiving end of being uglier, dumber, etc.

You yourself know your characteristics outdo OW. For the simple fact that OW was willing to screw around with a M man tells you that you are a better person. Most men seem to have A with women 'below' their W. By that I mean not as attractive, not as smart, not as funny. Remember, he married YOU for these qualities. He was seeking something different.

Now your friend who told you all of this is kinda rude for saying it to you. Granted, you cannot shoot the messenger, but there is definitely a proper way to say these things. I myself was just on the receiving end of a 'friend of hers' telling me stuff, and the same thing...what she told this friend just did not make sense. Also since my W has not been open and honest with ANYONE including her parents through out this ordeal, why would this random friend be the only one privy to such inside info from her. I suspect the same goes with your H and this person.

I know it is tough. When I heard all of this, it put me in a funk for about a week. It stings and it rips at your gut, so I understand. But please learn from me that you really just need to brush this aside. It means nothing. Absolutely nothing.

Keep your chin up girl! You are a rockstar and he is just a groupie. Treat him as such!