I think you are handling things just fine, TENSION like this is probably to be expected, your father's paternal protective instincts are coming to the forefront..and you have to respect that, you ight feel the same way if you were him...Eventually, once he sees how HAPPY his daughter is to have her M back in good standing, he will back off from his stern stance. Probably won't be asking your H to catch a ballgame any time soon.. , but as long as he senses you're HAPPY..he'll deal with it...
As for your H..the WINNING Cindy of course realizes that if her H loves her the RIGHT way, he does not get scared off by this type of thing, and of course she DOES NOT WORRY ABOUT IT..
If your H chooses not to apologize, I can understand his viewpoint, but I would ecpect him to have his ACTIONS shine through and show your father that he really is COMMITTED to being a better H..that will hold more weight in the long run than an apology just to appease your father's expectations..
When someone is forced to apologize rather than freely doing so..it usually doesn't come off with the type of sincerity that helps things..
Wow, last night h finally brought up the moving in convo! We talked for an hour about different scenarios. Finally we decided we are going to sell our house, move into a 2 bedroom apartment for 6 months so that we can shop for a new home!
I was so down yesterday...last night's convo was a definite pick up to the PMA!!!
The long wait has finally paid off! We'll be moving in together come June!!!
Awesome! I keep thinking that like you I'm dismissing the D, hope I see good things happen also.
Question~ Did you have to go in front of the judge to have it dismissed? Did you both go? Or was the signing for the motion to dismiss all you had to do?
Just wondering as my Att dragged his heals and court is set for April 7. The paper was filed March 12.
The dismissal can be signed at any time. The attorney takes it to the judge and judge signs...neither your nor h have to be there. You should not have to appear in court on April 7.
with it being signed on March 12, the dismissal should have gone through already...why the court date then?
Thanks, hon! Well att thinks he should be paid more per month I guess, my $10 check a month to him is not fast enough, so he wants to ask the judge to make H pay, how rude! But, says the jude will sign the dismissal then. i didn't think we had to be there for that! Thanks! I thought once it was filed, the judge signing it was just the cherry on top! LOL.
Think att is still button pushing, but he can do what he wants, I just hope they don't think I can pay this bill off! Because I can't! Not at grossing $9,900 a year!
WOO HOO! WOW! I'm so happy for you! Joint checking account! This is so awesome, I want to cry!
I've been posting since June 03...but h and I have been separated since December 02. I filed for d in Nov 02 when I found condoms in his gym bag that he said he didn't use but that he didn't owe me an explanation.
We've been to d court twice...this last time I'd had enough so I put in for a dismissal on 2/14/04. H was livid said he was going to get his own attorney (up to this point he'd been using mine), take the kids, take the house (I'd gotten the house and equity in our last decree), sue me for support, etc....he said he was going to do me like I'd done him pretty much. I said bring it on, he hung up on me. 4 days later he invited me to dinner then to lunch the next day where I finally got out of him that he wasn't going to put in for the d, he didn't want a d, never had and wasn't going to do it now.
So here we are....I know that is the really short version...during the past year I've dealt with him dating, sleeping with me, yelling at me numerous times it was over, kids not wanting to see him, h disappearing for days at a time on his visitation, him taking the kids out of school with no word to me why, etc. It has been a long scary ride but I held firm and though I started the d I continued to maintain that I didn't want it. H is the one that kept the d up there though I offered to dismiss numerous times...finally I just dismissed without asking him.
And now that we are reconciling things are better...he's really trying to be more loving and involved with the kids. I don't push...just watch and encourage. He's doing all the rest.
it's a big change from this time last year....when I found him with OW after he slept with me. Big difference now.
Well I laid low and nothing happened. My dad didn't say anything.
I did also start calling my other siblings to let them know my h and I are getting back together so there would be no surprise when I moved in with him.
I'll just keep serving my dad showing my appreciation. If he wants to say anything about h, well I'll be ready.
, but as long as he senses you're HAPPY..he'll deal with it...
