Spoke to a DB coach today and I have an action plan for H's upcoming visit, I wanted to see if anyone had any thoughts. She advised that I do not bring up anything about the status of our R or if there is or if he wants an OW. She says I have been doing his "dirty work" by asking all the questions and making him make choices. If the night he is home before my cruise comes and goes without any discussion about our M or anything related (finances, custody, etc) that is fine and I will still refuse to discuss it on the phone afterwards. This will be a 180 for me because I am a fixer by nature and like to get to the bottom of things and work them out and he knows how much this means to me so for me not to bring it up at all will likely really confuse him. She pointed out that any discussion of these things is another step towards D, which I do not want.
I'm a planner and good at taking and following direction so I pray that I can take her advice and handle this in a way that will help and not hurt.
Does anyone else have any thoughts or tips/suggestions?
Me- 40 H- 41 S8, D5, S4 M 19 y T 23 Bomb drop 6/2013 H asked for/filed for D 9/2014 22 yo OW discovered 9/19/14 they're engaged and living together
