Husband is leaving 2

[Train]

Yep. I remember when that statistic almost paralyzed me with fear.

You can't stop the A. But your actions may influence its ending sooner rather than later.

Funny story I meant to journal about here a few weeks ago:

H and I were out to dinner and talking. I asked him: if you had one piece of advice for left-behind spouses, when their spouse is out cheating, what would it be?

And his answer went something like this: "Act like you don't care. Just like *you* did, Train. You were happy and strong no matter how I was treating you."

Then he said something that made me chuckle on the inside (because I felt part of it was a little off-the-mark, but it also shows the quiet beauty of DB). He said: "My decision to end the A had not much to do with how you were acting. I had to get to that point on my own."

I just replied: "Yeah. I think so, too."

But just for my own personal sh!ts and giggles, I asked: "But what if I would have withdrawn from you entirely and been rude? Or what if I would have begged you to stay and not left you alone?"

And, as expected, he said: "Easy. That would have just driven me away."

It's textbook. Almost scientific. Just like most ALL spouses who are cheating use the line ILYBINILWY, many of the dynamics of the A are quite predictable. And what we, as LBSs, can do to increase our chances of re-attracting our WASs is pretty standard, too.

The *real* hard, unpredictable work comes after we HAVE re-attracted them. But I'll spare you my whining on that subject for now.

Grace under fire, baby. You've got this. Go ye forth. Be bada$s. Knock him dead, sista.