Organizing cupboard, getting school things ready & found h dressed to go out. he was eating (food I bought & cooked) which saves hm $$ sometimes re: having to pick stuff up. clearly rushing - there was a phone conversation about a gathering that he's going to - "mind if I stay at your place until logistics are worked out with ?" Didn't seem as if he knew this person too well.
He was very nice to me, always is ... asked me if I needed help (that's new, started about 3 days ago)Let me know he was leaving for a gathering and would help on return.
Recent observations: -> all job prospects are in the crapper. including one he came closest to! -> seems to have lost shoes (?) went in one set this past week, returned w/another! -> evidence of drinks in car (with straws). looked like 'woman's drink (?). generally speaking, men don't use these skinny, colorful straws -> few months ago - the very **LAST time we were out together, I got food poisoning. I was brought home, undressed with all the love and attn. one could hope for. h helped me undress to my underwear to be comfortable, complete with cover - oh so loving! I was then unceremoniously left on the bed as he scurried quickly back out (!) Sick, I could hear the car in 'full throttle', URGENTLY scooting back to the clubs!
Just recently, I found a receipt dated about 3 weeks after that incident. Turned out to be the same eating place ... for 2 customers, including wine! (it was a fluke ... I thought God really does exist (!), as the wind gusted through the windows, providing me with something more tangible. It was almost like a movie. (And where there are excessive lies, there are mistakes) Moral: Liars should always purchase really good paper weights ... for whenever hasty! So EA/PA/OW is confirmed. h has "no money, & no place to stay" as echoed last night like a victim - so tough for him here with the tons of cake eating.
My real dilemma though is that my munchkin "wants the family" - I made a casual joke about moving on... to test the 'kiddy waters' (didn't think it funny as at!!) I don't think that it would be easy for child to handle another loss issue just 1 year apart at this time.
I am thinking so much as my deadline approaches ... I am thinking of going 'darker' somehow (before I was dim, PMA & supportive, with a GAL, which may be on life support soon). Going dark is going to be hard in this space! I will ask for monthly contribution toward expenses? What do you think? That's fair - he said he had "no money", so no wonder the secrecy to cover up what he does manage to obtain! But he gets it from somewhere! I know it isn't enough for him to 'make it' out there - But I would like some of the money - he's not the one facing the bills. Am I making any sense?
Children complicate matters so much ... pb
------------------------------------------- ** re: 'stare' - I always wanted to ask! Witnessed it that ('sick') night! And it was weird! I often wondered about it. Does anyone know more about this? what does it mean? What are they thinking or why do they stare? What is going on?
Just a thought - I used to feel bad about commenting on his stuff, as he would NOT like this, but it's all the truth - & mlcers don't feel bad about lying anyway.
Last edited by pbetra; 09/07/1407:12 PM.
pbetra ---- M: 15 yrs (in 2014) BD: 6/03/2014 Infidelity ('known' from July 2014) Denied PA Feb 2015 2 leave Mar 2015 (left early Summer). Some contact. Back briefly 2017 (after family death) Separated 2017
(!) Sick, I could hear the car in 'full throttle', URGENTLY scooting back to the clubs! 
(And where there are excessive lies, there are mistakes) Moral: Liars should always purchase really good paper weights ... for whenever hasty!
