What to do when an EA involved?

[Hoju]

FIL came by to help pack/move today, i felt guilty again and helped him move some of the bigger furniture. Brought back a lot of memories over the past 10 years we've been together I've probably helped her family move 20+ times.

The fog with the WAW and OM is very strong. We just had a short chat about moving on and wishing each other the best. She is still pretty negative about our relationship, blaming everything on my computer gaming addiction (which has been 180'd for months). She's convinced people don't change or is trying to convince herself people don't change to make what she has done easier for her. She did say that her family is mostly supporting me in this, which was nice to hear, i know it doesn't mean [censored] but still feels good to have some cheerleaders. Moving onward trying to stay positive, need to hope OM hits it and ditches it (as much as that kills me to say about my wife).

She also said she has been a people pleaser for so long that she lost who she was, not sure what that means? She sure as hell never tried to please me. Even now it seems like she is still trying to please people just the single crowd instead of the married crowd. Anyone ever had this one dropped on them and can add some insight?