This doesn't make much sense to me. How was your marriage before you were remarried with friends and family?
Our marriage was relatively happy. Most of the arguments that I described before took place before and after the marriage. I can tell you that the best time of our marriage was when she got fired from her previous job back in July 2013. I know it sounds contradictory, but it made her put her feet on the ground and was significantly less angry with me during arguments, which allowed us to both fix things promptly, without escalating to chaotic arguments. She then found a great job in January 2014.
Originally Posted By: lovethehub
What complaints did your W have?
I know she complained about my SIL's attitude when we were attending family get-together. This happened from February all the way through June 2nd, which was the day they made peace. Also, in the past she expressed that she did not like my aunt's husband's attitude because he called her out in the past regarding several incidents that happened in my aunt's house and in church (refer to the previous post for more details on one of the incidents.) At the beginning of our relationship she complained about me being too close to my family, specifically my aunt. I used to visit her and my cousins twice a week. After her valid complaints, I lowered the visits to once a month, and sometimes once every couple months. She still complained about me wanting to visiting my aunt. Keep in mind that I always included my wife every time I visited my aunt or any other family member, and she would sometimes get upset if I would go by myself. I recently found out that my W had complained to my aunt about me visiting my parents when they were in town. They live 600 miles away from here and the only come once a year, maybe twice. Every time they come I always took my wife to visit them so we all can spend time together. But this only happens once in a blue, so I don't know why she complained that I always wanted to be with my parents and not spent enough time with her. She complained about me being too explosive during arguments. I explained to her countless times that I don't appreciate when she yells at me and gets in my face while arguing, sometimes I even feel droplets of saliva hitting my face when she yells and gets in my face. Then at that point I start yelling, which makes her very upset.
Originally Posted By: lovethehub
What were you unhappy with?
To be honest, what made me very unhappy was the fact that she asked me to tell my brother not to have his wife walk down the aisle as we agreed months ago (see the story on Page 1). So off course my brother didn't showed up to the wedding, as well as my nephews. This really hurt me as I wanted all to be there for us in our special day. Then 2 weeks later the beach incident happens, in which she told me that now she knows what kind of man I am (See Page 2 and 3 for the full story). In the past, a thing that bothered me was the fact that even when I stopped visiting my family as frequently as I used to, she would complain if I try to make plans with her to go to family events. I never called my parents to complain about her, but I did the opposite, I would call my mom or my brother in order to justify her actions if there was something that bothered somebody in the family. They always understood her and respect us as a couple. Other thing that I did not really like was the fact that most of the time we had arguments when I was planning a guys night out. I only went out with just the guys less than 10 times in our whole relationship (every 2 to 3 months). 8 out of 10 times that I went out with the guys, we end up arguing right before I meet up with the guys. While we were at home, I couldn't be alone at the computer without her asking me what was I doing on the computer, why was I using the computer, etc. This did not happen all the time, but it happened often enough to make me feel that I was being slightly controlled. Add to this the fact that I had to cancel my FB accnt per her request (we argued about it). One thing that sets me off pretty much all the time is the fact that she will take one situation that can be solved in a matter of 20 minutes and expand it to the point that it would take hours or days to get it resolved. Add to this the yelling in my face and backing me into a corner.
Originally Posted By: lovethehub
What did she confess that was so horrible?
On page 2 and 3 I explained what she said. But I will repeated for your convenience . She confessed something while we were in the water that was not too bad. So the confession itself was not an issue. I may not have explained myself correctly. The statements that hurt my feelings were the following:
1. "You abandoned me! You left me all by myself in the water! How could you do that to me?"
2. "Now I know what kind of man are you!" 3. "You know what? We should never been together in the first place!" 4. "Why did we even married?"
This all happened at the beach during the heated argument discussed on page 2 and 3.
Hope this answer your questions. Please feel free to ask questions. And everybody is more than welcome to ask me questions. I know is a very confusing situation, but I would really appreciate any help. Have a blessed day.
. She confessed something while we were in the water that was not too bad. So the confession itself was not an issue. I may not have explained myself correctly. The statements that hurt my feelings were the following:
