advice needed - please help

[stacey9]

hi - thanks so much Dawgy for checking in with me. I have been reading your threads and know you're going through tough times just now. I hope you're better today. I didn't offer any advice because I sometimes feel if my advice was any good then I wouldn't be in the position I'm in!

And thanks Peter - great advice, I am reading DR just now and I do prefer it to DB. I feel as though I am being scolded for doing all the wrong things in the run up to H leaving. He told me in August he was leaving but did not leave until January. If I had read DR then I think I could have shown him my best self and although he would still have left, it may have planted a little doubt in his mind. Instead I was sulky, sullen, moody, insecure, all the things he hated about me, and he was glad to get away from. Straight into the arms of the OW who he is still with now.

I still have good days and bad days. On my good days I am enjoying my new fitness regime, my job, my kids and also just enjoying watching movies and sipping wine at weekends!

On my bad days I just cannot get it out of my head that he has chosen this OW who he will think is prettier, smarter and sexier than me, and he seems to be so serious with her I am consumed with jealousy. But I continue to show H my best side, I am friendly, upbeat and not at all insecure or jealous. I think he has noticed this. We have now been apart 8 months and during that time I have only felt a connection between us a couple of times. And by connection I mean when our eyes met for a few seconds and I felt something was still there. I don't honestly know if he felt anything at all, but I know I could not get involved with anyone else while I still feel this way about him.

So I will continue to try and GAL, be mysterious, and the project in the house is an excellent idea - thanks Peter.

Thanks again for your posts, I really appreciate it.

Take care
Stacey x