Found out W was on extremely destrutive spiral including multiple men, modest drug usage, and a lot of alcohol. She was texting with many different people and had a different persona with each one. The healthy people in her life had been losing contact as she was more and more with those with the most problems. Finally she reached out to me and she freaked because it hit too close to reality. She attempted suicide this morning and is in the hospital.
My world has flipped. I was out of house and working full time. At this moment I'm moving back in. My kids need me, and though I've never been a great dad I have been doing better. I have to figure this out.
The scary part is the hypocrisy. If I did this she would use it as proof that I should never again be trusted with the kids. However I have the feeling she and her family are going to expect me to let her resume where she left off. I don't think that's ok right now. I'm going to meet an L right away Monday if possible to find out my rights. Between the attempted suicide and the conversation histories she's had with many guys and their content I don't think any judge would say she's the fit mother right now. I am not sure this will go well, her mother has ready suggested that Cheri needs the children or shed just do this again. That whole premise is crazy.
But the thought if moving in, packig her stuff, taking over as full time dad, and going back to work is overwhelming. I have short term help from my dad. I can get some time off work. But still...so much to do. All I can say is I have my next 24 hours planned out and will do my best day by day.
For now I'm doing ok. But no one should ever be here and this is a severe test in my trust in the universe. I hope the last 10 weeks have prepared me for my task because I cannot fail my Children.
Me:38 XW:38 T:11 years M:8 years Kids: S14, D11, D7 BD/Move out day: 6/17/14, D final Dec 15
