Thanks Matt that's such a nice thing to say! Things are going well and I'm happier than I've been for a very long time in retrospect. I still come by here just not as often and I read stories but haven't really commented because I'm sort of biased now and feel like coming here is dwelling in the past. Especially since it's a DB site and I'm divorced now. On the other hand, when I first came here it was so incredibly helpful just knowing I wasn't alone, so I will continue to visit and check in. I remember when the BD happened so well and it felt like I was the only person in the entire universe that this was happening to, I hate to revisit that place, so dark. Now I look back on the last 8 months and see my own journey and how I picked myself up and have learned so much. Still loads to learn, always will be. Anyone have any good book recommendations on communication? I had learned from my IC to use "I feel" statements and not place blame or make "you do this" type of stuff, trying to not repeat past mistakes and the ex and I definitely had terrible communication. I find myself acknowledging my error more when I react badly instead of responding calmly - - and I am trying to self correct, it's a slow thing to change your communication style and I'd like to read more about it
Me - 42 exH - 56 Married 10.5 years Together 17 bomb dropped 1/6/14 signed papers 2/4/14 H moved out 2/22/14 D final 4/4/14 Dropped the rope 5/17/14 2 cats, 2 dogs
that's such a nice thing to say! Things are going well and I'm happier than I've been for a very long time in retrospect. I still come by here just not as often and I read stories but haven't really commented because I'm sort of biased now and feel like coming here is dwelling in the past. Especially since it's a DB site and I'm divorced now. On the other hand, when I first came here it was so incredibly helpful just knowing I wasn't alone, so I will continue to visit and check in. I remember when the BD happened so well and it felt like I was the only person in the entire universe that this was happening to, I hate to revisit that place, so dark. Now I look back on the last 8 months and see my own journey and how I picked myself up and have learned so much. Still loads to learn, always will be. Anyone have any good book recommendations on communication? I had learned from my IC to use "I feel" statements and not place blame or make "you do this" type of stuff, trying to not repeat past mistakes and the ex and I definitely had terrible communication. I find myself acknowledging my error more when I react badly instead of responding calmly - - and I am trying to self correct, it's a slow thing to change your communication style and I'd like to read more about it
