Starsky...I agree that no one has told me to go into d*ck mode. I am having a hard time drawing the line without seeming that way. It is my problem to solve, totally agree. I need to show her by my actions that I do not need her and that I am moving forward.

How did you act around your wife when you told her about your boundaries and instituted plan B? I understand no proactive texting, calling, emails unless about the kids. But what about when you were home together? Did you just not talk to her and/or not remain in the same room when she entered? Did you not do family dinners together? Did you not watch TV together as a family? If the kids wanted to watch a movie on TV, did you not watch it with them if your W was present?

Me: 40, W: 40
M: 15, T: 18
D - 10, S - 7
D announcement 6/7/2014
A discovered 7/20/2014 (but denied by W)
Still living together and sharing same bed