How to Fling an Otter Across Two States

[LoisB]

Sitting at my garage sale. It's a bit thrown together, but I've earned $50 so far. We are heading back to Watertown tomorrow to look at a property that seems to fit our criteria...affordable lease, older/historic home, possibility of land contract at some point, pets allowed, rural/in the town where I will be working...etc...The property needs some work, but the owners are anxious to put someone in it. It's been sitting empty for 2 years. The owners seem to be really lovely people who adore the property and want to see someone come in and love it like they do. We shall see. There's a treehouse, winding creek in the back, surrounded by farmland and old barns...

I met with my atty this morning. My heart is heavy today. It's not because he gave bad news...just scary. My main concern...above the money...is having Smokey FORCE D12 to visit for months at a time...really, having her being forced to visit at all is a concern.

He wasn't able to reassure me that it couldn't happen. But, when I told him of Smokey's pattern of involvement (zero)...he said, "I would imagine this move of yours is something of a relief to him."

This atty has been at this for nearly thirty years. He said that having a psychologist on my side...would be to our advantage. I am thinking that having two psychologists on our side would be even better. I may take her back to the original doc who diagnosed the Asperger's...let her know D12's progress and give her .02 on the importance of D having a say in whether she sees her dad.

So much of this has been out of her control. I want her to feel like she has choices with this man who has mistreated her so badly. I just don't want her forced to do anything she is uncomfortable with...she has already had to compromise on so many things...And, now, the move. So, I guess I do feel somewhat empowered that I can put her in a position to have the most say.

I'm preparing for the worst...but, my instincts say that Smokey will simply avoid the conflict like he always does. IDK. I can handle it. D12 can handle it. She is a tough cookie.

Really hard going through his stuff. He just left his life behind. Just threw up his arms and left. It's been painful, but cathartic to go through stuff. The reality sorta washes over each time a new memory comes up.

Last night, I had to step away while the girls continued to pack. I had had enough memories. Retreated to my room and played a word game. Zoned out.

I have to look over the current dissolution proposal, email the atty my requested changes. Meet with him again on Monday morning. Million things to do...Somehow it will all get done.