Inside my chrysalis 2

[Card29]

OK, successful at no initiating contact, even though some Amazon orders for him came in today (not time sensitive). I'm sure he got an email that they were delivered.

One of the boxes is a bunch of stuff for him to decorate D7's room at his place. On one hand I love that he knows her so well (it's all space stuff, stars, a moon, a mobile of the planets) but it hurts that he feels like he'll be out long enough to need that stuff. He did sign a year lease so I guess I should batten down the hatches for at least that long, huh?

It is MUCH easier to detach when we have no contact. In fact, when D7 is with me, I feel like I could survive this no problem. It's when she's not home that I HATE my life.

I was just thinking today that if H had died (God forbid!!!) and I was left alone with D7, it would be awful of course and I'd be depressed and things would be HARD but we'd survive because 1) what other option is there? and 2) he'd be gone and there'd be nothing I could do to bring him back. Nothing.

THIS though, this LBS stuff? It's so much about "maybe" or "will he?" or "I hope" or "please, please, please" which is what makes this HELL.

Ugh. As a disgruntled DBer I say, "onward".

Ss, you read my mind with almost every post.

I was upset for a little bit when she bought a shower curtain for her apartment. LOL!