Ss, I have been saying over and over again "This is your call." or "I know you're a good dad." or "You're the dad, you get to decide that." It's only in the last couple of weeks that he's started stepping up better. In fact, it was after we had an exchange where he asked me if the kids wanted to talk to him and I said that it would be better if he asked whether HE wanted to talk to THEM that he started being more proactive about spending time with them.
We got D11 a cell phone last week that we'd been discussing all summer. I really thought he'd take the lead on that because it's his area of interest and expertise, but he just kept vaguely saying "we need to talk about her phone" and then not doing anything about it. I finally did it myself when the lack of a phone started impacting me. He hasn't asked any questions about dentist appointments, etc., that they've had.
But as I say, I want to give him space to be a great dad. As much for the kids as for him or me. I just never felt like he wanted that space.
Me42, H40 D12, S8, S7 A revealed: 7/13 Sep 4/14; Agreed to D 1/15
