Do you have your own atty? Your post above refers to the mediator and to your wife's atty, but I don't see anything about what your atty might be advising you?
As for your main question, I would say YES, you should go darker (and shouldn't have done the lake house thing). If your wife wants to flee the marriage and her family, she needs to begin feeling what it would be like to be separated or divorced. You guys can still do SOME family things together, for the sake of your son (special occasions), but for the most part you should each of your own time with him, without the other.
