Thank you...Job, GB, Bets, and GGG for your responses and thoughts. I appreciate the variety of perspectives you each offered here.
I feel like the ball of a very messy yarn that was pounced on by 10 cats with very, very sharp claws just laying out like a lump in the middle of the area rug with strings going out in every direction.
Oh man...what I would give to arrive at a place of complete, utter indifference toward Ms. Wonka and the freakshow of OW. Oops...did that bleed out of my noggin??!
Speaking of bleeding, you all probably would agree (especially Job and Bets who have been around since time immemorial here) that I've bit my tongue in my interactions/dealings with Ms. Wonka way too many times that blood pretty much literally dripped downward to my chin.
Today, I thought and reflected a bit on Ms. Wonka's email and I struggled with the main questions:
-What type of friendship do I want with her? -What does a mutually supportive and respectful friendship look like to me? -Do I want to invest my time and energy on this friendship, if any?
At this point, I am still sitting on the indignation sofa trying to separate the wheat from the chaff trying to figure out a way to pinpoint and identify the actual emotions while going back to my thoughts that influenced those emotions. As you all know from the greater Spiritual perspective, our thoughts and reactions drive our emotions.
I need more time to sort out them so I can come from a place of calmness and clearheaded before I respond to Ms. Wonka. Like GGG stated here, my emotions and reactions are most certainly clouding my perspective on this latest exchange.
What I most need in the next several days/weeks is to figure out how I can be authentic while remaining true to my core values and principles. How's that helping me? How's that helping Ms. Wonka? How's that helping us?
I don't have clear answers to any of the above questions. Need to do some more digging here.
GGG, I would like to respond to your comment on why I am not like a lot of lesbians who remain best buddies with their exes.
-I am on good terms with several of my former exes -Yes, a lot of lesbians are friends with their exes
I have a theory (or not!). I will add my thoughts at the end.
Generally, women tend to the be the ones who try to smooth things over coming from a place of compromise, compassion, and cooperation in the "best" interests of all involved.
Many lesbians remain friends with their exes because they've worked past their issues and transitioned fairly well into friendship.
Now for my thoughts on why I differ a bit with Ms. Wonka is because of the three main factors:
-We had a very deep, loving bond as a couple who were pretty much heavily invested in the relationship---puppy parents, open & accepting families surrounded us with love, bought a house and been together for 10 years
-I was pretty devastated after witnessing some of the stuff that Ms. Wonka and OW did in conducting their A
-With my exes, I was never really "in love" with them so the transition was easier for me and them. The longest relationship I had with my exes was 2 years at the most. Beside that...I was a commitment-phobic so I never really allowed them close to me.
