Hi sweetie. Sorry you are here but you are among some amazing people.

So, the things your h is saying have been said to everyone here is one form or another. It is called the script.

If you believe him to be in crisis, then understand that there isnt anything you can do to help him through it.

Your job is to get out of the way of him walking it.

The way you do that is to begin to detach. That means not allowing his words or actions to effect yours.

It means that you hear what he is saying...he doesnt want to be married right now. You dont have to agree, but, you do have to hear it.

You may have to take this one moment at a time sometimes. But you will be ok.

Put the focus on you and your children. Leave him to his stuff.

Keep posting here and to others. It gets you off moderation more quickly.

Start to look at what he wrote. Determine what has merit and what doesnt. Then begin to make those changes....for you.

Hang in there.