Recover from an A

[Heart14]

My H and I have been working on healing our M for the last month or so. We have had occasional set backs and are still working through the mindfield of feelings we both have. I have taken the approach that I need to know some details. I ask the things that I start to feel obsessive over. I've not wanted intimate details, but I did want to understand the timeline of what happened and any lies that I was told during the A. This has actually really helped me start to heal and move forward. Part of the reason it was important for me was that the OW is a coworker of his and they still have to see each other and correspond in that context. Building trust back will probably be a long process. With every honest answer I feel closer. It's been therapeutic for me that a lot of my suspicions match up with his answers.

I think I would have a problem with her not acknowledging that it was hurtful to you. You had an expectation and she didn't abide by that. Have you specifically spelled out how you feel about what she did?