Heather, I'm proud of you for standing up to your D20. I had a feeling she was going to return and announce that she wanted to go back. Why? Because of all her friends and activities. I agree w/you...had she gotten the grades and paid her $2500 on time, you might have been leaning more towards her going back, but she didn't do either one. She's still very new in admitting that she's got a problem with alcohol and she needs to be attending AA and getting stronger in her recovery.
She's an adult now, so she needs to figure out what she's going to do w/her life. It's time now for her to grow up and figure out what she wants to do and how to go about it. Life provides lessons and we all have to make mistakes and figure out how to correct them.
I wouldn't apologize again. You've had to make some tough decisions and you are the one that was at home, trying to home school and keep the family together and yes, stress over money, while your D20 was away at school. She truly has no idea, or maybe doesn't want to see, what you had to deal with.
Heather, drop the rope and allow her to figure her own life out. If she opts to remain behind when you move, so be it...but if she opts to go, you will need to emphasize to her that she will need to figure things out, get a job and if she wants to take some classes at night, she can do so. If I recall, she had several incompletes last year...what happens with those? Does she retake the classes?
Stick to your guns and do not waiver on what you've told her. Time for her to grow up and accept responsibility for her actions.
P.S. Heather, I'm sorry if my earlier posting hurt you, but I was stating only the simple truth. Some walk away and never look back and leave their families in the dust. No one knows what your h will do, but from his patterns, he may very well be a Disney Dad and only post periodically and around holidays. Time will tell once you move.
