Hi Mighty, My W has come into MY home (she CHOSE to leave it and get her own!) many times when I'm not here and took things that weren't hers to take! When I told her not to come here as it's no longer her home but mine, she said "It's still my house until the D is final". Oh, so since we're still M, then I should just be able to walk into HER rental and take whatever I want? Oh, no. That's HER home. Just like teenagers, they see themselves as above any "rules". They do whatever they want to do and get offended and angry if called on their actions. I had to have my lawyer file an order with the court keeping her out! Even after that she still has come and taken things like the kids savings bonds and birth certificates without my consent or knowledge. Worse yet she brought her father and step mother who she knows I cannot stand and would NEVER allow into my home!
I suggest you make this a firm boundary. He may balk at this but at least in my state, you can get an order that they can't enter unless they are with a "disinterested third party" (which can mean a sherif's deputy) and tell you ahead of time. I thought about changing the locks but I would need to give the key to my D14 and she wouldn't just not let her mother in (and shouldn't be put into that position). The last time she came when I wasn't here my D14 called me to let me know without my W's knowing because SHE was smart enough to know it was wrong!
Always remember...they have no normal morals. They will do whatever THEY feel they want and feel so entitled it's like a 4 year old with power! I would check that there's nothing missing that he may have felt "entitled" to having. I may be wrong but I wouldn't put it past him!
