Do I offer to postpone the sharing until we discuss in MC, but insist on the no contact letter now? Or just wait for next week for all of it?
Postpone both the sharing and the no contact letter until the MC... According to your discussion with her when she agreed to the MC and no contact letter, I don't see where it states that you agreed to a day or time for her to write one. You gave her an out by not agreeing to an actual deadline.
Not only that, but you BOTH agreed to wait on difficult topics until MC. (backed yourself into another corner) So I would say that you should wait until MC.
Here is the conversation you said you had a couple of weeks ago regarding these issues. I don't see where there was a day or time deadline for the no contact letter. You can't hold her to something that wasn't agreed upon. (mistake on YOUR part for that)
It looks like she agreed to no contact, but not WHEN... Right away? Tomorrow? After MC? Next month?.....
Get it? You gave her an out because a deadline wasn't agreed upon, plus you also BOTH agreed to wait to discuss difficult topics until MC. Now she can use your asking about the no contact letter as controlling. Pressuring people doesn't work. You are pressuring her. Most people fight AGAINST pressure.
Quote:
Good timing- W just left. We agreed to try to work on things. Conversation had its ups and downs. We'd start going into difficult topics, but then would agree that we should probably wait until MC.
So W asked me to find a MC and set that up. She also agreed no OM contact. I told her that involved writing a letter for me to approve and send as well as both of us sharing emails, passwords, etc. She was fully on board, which really surprised me. W left and we hugged goodbye. Family bday party tomorrow and we talked about trying to go out on some dates upcoming.
