Dealing with WAW part 5

[25yearsmlc]

Hey pilot,
Just read your post about the phone call with the friend of WAW. Here are my thoughts:

1. Who is this "friend" and why is she getting involved? It seems strange to me that she would be the confidante of your W and then tell you what she said? Maybe I missed the part about that. Do you think she could have ulterior motives? I don't get why this friend would want to gossip about all this with you.


I Echo this ^^^ x 1000...it's NOT relevant. This "source" is the same woman who is in a lousy m herself, which she shares with your w (And YOU)....um, okay...AND she told you what her hubby said, which he had NO basis for saying. Why would she pass that little gem onto you? ThInk about that...

and her h said "HE bet your wife had had an affair"...this man had NO FACTUAL basis for that allegation!!! But h boldly hurled it out. I'd never answer either of their calls again and I sure as heck would put ZERO stock in their 'insights"....talk about projecting their own problems onto someone else.

Do you realize how bad you made HER H look? And how bad your wife made HER look?? (remember, the "friend" whined and bitterly complained about her h, to your wife, who NEVER said a word to her about you....IF THAT IS TRUE, then the rest makes zero sense....your wife showed loyalty to you and they could not handle that

No one on DB should ever make a decision based on triple hearsay, and such biased "opinions"....
.

2. The reason your W supposedly gave for delaying the D could be true. On the other hand it could be an excuse on her part. She is not ready to do it, and that is the reason she is saying. That doesn't mean that is the real reason. And above all, her feelings could change. Whatever the reason, she isn't doing it.

3. All the other stuff I would mostly ignore as you said it is old news. Very old news. Who cares.

AMEN

4. Interesting that she said she was thinking about being with you until you threw cold water on the whole thing. So yeah, I think you know what is happening.

I saw that as your w wanting you to know she "would have ---but for your rejection of her", which also is inconsistent with the claims the other "Friend" is making.

Geez....when it's this confusing, pay no attention til you hear it from the horses mouth and even then....only part


You have a handle on the situation. None of this sounds like news to me. It probably just hurts a lot hearing it again and from someone else.

for ego reasons it hurts more when it comes from others, and I get that. But in reality it has even LESS validity. Don't forget that, okay?

But if you can, let it go. I think the only news you heard was that she wanted to go ahead with the D but was delaying to spare your feelings. That sounds like BS. If she was interested in sparing your feelings none of this would be happening, would it?

Chin up pilot! You are doing great. Let this slide off your back.
Hugs, LisaB

She's not ready to say she's not ready to divorce. She's not ready to say she is confused. But what else could be made of her comment (AND Behavior which you yourself witnessed and said "Could have gotten physical")

other than SHE IS CONFUSED and that means she's got mixed feelings. And for most of us, that would be GOOD NEWS. And please consider

Losing those "Friends" and don't bet on their marriage lasting 3 more years (assuming fidelity is required).