I hear what you're saying, nit, and I wonder many of the same things daily. Hourly.
I was always raised to SAY something if I needed something. I'm not someone whose mind needs to be read. If I need help, I ask. If I want a hug, I ask. If I want to go out to dinner, I say so. When I felt like our marriage lacked I spoke up... probably too much. H? He just sat quiet for a year or more stewing in his victimness. He'd say a tiny thing here or there but never elaborate or just say, "nevermind". When someone says nevermind I believe them. I don't do the whole "does he say what he means" bs. I say what I mean and I expect others to do the same. Mind reading makes things complicated and life is too complicated as it is.
So, here I am... because I didn't mind read... yet, I'm reminded daily to not mind read further to get an insight into his actions. It's ironic, to me.
