Wife Still in MLC but has now left #3

[AJM]

Matt, your vents are becoming more organized if no repetitive. They tend to do that over time, until eventually you get tired of saying what others won't want to hear. I'm not tired of it, Matt. I'm pointing out what will happen in your face to face relationships, including your MIL, etc.

For what it's worth, I think you are spot on with your assessments if not a little emotionally biased (who wouldn't be, right?)

If you stop expecting her to be different, I think your life will dramatically improve. If you start thinking that she will bad-mouth you, your daughter (the one that doesn't go along anyway), your MIL, your favorite childhood pet, etc as a way to control you (even if she means it at the time) you'll see things differently and it will dramatically improve your outlook and ability to deal with all that is going on. Don't get stuck just venting, is all I'm saying. You in no way should want to become a victim.

In fact, you could have left years ago. You lived with a depressed person for many years. A spouse that wants daddy's approval (he is a piece of work; he should meet my former MIL - they'd hit it off famously I'm sure) and love so much so that she's calling his new wife "mom". What a slap in the face to her own mom.

That's a sign of where she is at in her own life's journey. She's got choices to make and that's that.

What is more concerning, since you're here, is why you aren't jumping up and down for joy at the demise of your marriage? Why your W did you a favor and you're not happy about it. Or why you expect what isn't going to happen?

I think the answers to those questions will help you more than anything at this point. Keep venting by all means, but keep an eye on the next step too.

AJ