On the brink, need a miracle

[Onguard]

My W suggested a last minute trip to Chicago to see Luke Bryan and do some shopping with our D13. I had plans with some friends on Sunday and did not want to cancel on them at the last minute so I told her that I could not go. Instead, our family and her parents went to a baseball game on Monday. I noticed that she was not wearing her wedding ring but did not say anything until we got home. That is when she made it clear that she was furious with me for not taking advantage of the chance for us to do something that she wanted to do. She said "I served this up to you on a silver platter. You might have been able to save your marriage but you dragged your feet again." These were the types of things that have happened in the past that made her feel neglected and not "heard" in our M. It is something she wanted to do but we did not do it. If it were something I wanted to do then we would have done it. (This is her opinion).If we were in the process of working on our M, I would have cancelled my plans and done the Chicago trip. But she has clearly stated that she is not able to commit to our M and doesn't know if she ever will.

On one hand, I agree with her that I had an opportunity to show her a positive change and I failed to do that. But canceling my plans at the last minute to cater to her would be pursuing. I told her that if we were trying to make it work then I would have gone to Chicago. She said, too little too late. She is now back to talking about Separation and D. So, like Shodan, I feel like my actions are pushing her farther away. I am trying to trust the process, like him, but I am afraid that I blew an opportunity. Any thoughts?