I'll Take What's Behind Door Number 3 #8

[Georgiabelle]

I have an issue. S4 went with his dad and asked if he could spend the night. Stbx said he had to work tonight and tomorrow. Older kids began jumping up and and down when they left saying "he's lying mommy! He's not working." This is not my issue.

I ran errand with other S and D. At lunch, they made the comment that their Dad said they have been eating too much lately. Both s and d have gained some weight since their dad's overt crisis began in 2013. S has some anxiety and stress eating as did D. I want the kids to be healthy, however I've not made any deal out of this. Certainly not calling them out on it as it's rather obvious why it has occurred. He also told kids I are too much sometimes. However, I just said, " I do indulge sometimes. I work out and try to be as healthy as possible." (I'm pretty gosh darn fit although not ready for the next Victoria's Secret catalog). Mentally I was thinking that I can eat better some days although I'm most happy to be sane. That's not very DB, huh? It bothers me because he sees them about 6 hours a week and to choose this one topic with them versus asking how they are (he's never asked ), how school is, etc just irritates me. For the record, he is not an Olympic triathlete. Yes, I realize I'm senstibr to this topic. I do not want the kids to obsess about this garbage like I did.

Which brings me to a call with my mom. I DB my mom big time. The call was generally pleasant until she said ,"how much does D weigh now?" I just said that I wasn't sure and we've been enjoying the pool and horseback lessons this summer.

WTF is up with people and weight? It never crosses my mind to ask people how much they weigh. I did talk to the kids doctor in private and he said it was not uncommon. I will not make a big deal about this. The kids are not obese.

D did say that I was too pleasant to their Dad and why didn't I call him out. I barely speak to him. I told her that I can only control me and I do what I think is best. My goal is one day to have a friendly R with their Dad. It's difficult right now as he lies about everything. As the vets tell me, this is who is now and I do understand that. Old stbxh would never have said something like this to kids. Grrrrrrr.