D12's Birthday. No card yesterday from Smokey. She received a text today.

She is struggling with this move and the anarchy of our lives right now. I can't fix it for her and it kills me. I just have to believe that we are going to something better than what we are leaving.

Ordered her a large pizza and rootbeer. We have no Jeep because D20 is still visiting girlfriends. We've enjoyed the peace and quiet though. Feel badly I can't give D12 a rockin b'day...but, I did take her to the concert.

I've been so tangled in the past here. Surrounded. As I sort through stuff, I see how entangled I've been. He was able to walk away and start fresh. I've been weighed down by memory after memory.

I feel some anger about that today...that he was the one who was able to just walk away.

Still, listened to a really good sermon about men in midlife and it brought some forgiveness and peace this morning.

What if I can't do this job? What if I'm working all the time and D12 needs me and I can't be there for her AND the job? What if???

Last edited by LoisB; 08/31/14 07:00 PM.
"You know, it's times like these when I realize what a superhero I am." Tony Stark/Iron Man

“Focus on what you can do, then do it with all your heart.” Lois Wilson