Yes, he is uncomfortable with questions and tends to accuse me of just not liking the answer he's giving. Upon reflection, I think sometimes he's right about that, but more often (especially now that I'm aware of his complaint) it's because I don't fully understand what he's said.
Another example: Our anniversary was a week after BD. He came over and we did an exercise from a Gottman book that our former MC recommended. As the conversation was winding down, I said, "So, I won't see you again for three weeks after tonight?" (Three weeks was the initial "break" he'd asked for during the S.) He said, "I think we'll play that by ear," and kind of smiled as he said it. So, I thought it was positive, but not entirely sure -- "play it by ear" could be mean that he might want more than three weeks, you know? I consciously chose not to ask him about it then, but a few days later I broke down and he confirmed that he meant it the positive way.
Our MC encouraged over-clarification. I remember asking my H in session, "How can I ask for clarification in a way that doesn't interfere with your need for less conflict," and I think his answer was something like, "We'll just have to see how it plays out." I feel like this is something that must be resolved in order to have a successful R.
