A lot of my hesitation is losing the momentum of the case my L has built up regarding custody and then the financial aspect as far as the return of my vehicles and other assets that I have a lot of cash tied up in. I plan on selling everything and putting the money back in my savings and really cutting back.
so this leaves me here. What if this happens again? I want to protect my self. Is it weird to ask H to have a legal agreement drawn up. I know this might sound crazy but if I'm going to jump back in and risk that he may or may not do this again I want to be protected. Any thoughts? H told me he would basically agreee to pretty much anything at this point as long as it's remotely fair and it wouldn't 'matter' to him as much because he doesn't ever plan on divorcing me so what I would want or ask for he would be willing to agree to to prove to me he is serious and committed. I have not told him what I was thinking I was just jokingly tossing the idea last night to see his response. It was much better than I thought
I was driving at this for a while, you didn't seem to concerned before (not a dig, strictly an observation). But YES you should have already discussed this with your L, You should have (and have had) a separation agreement in place. It should lay out everyone's obligations, housing and agreements about shared property.
Furthermore, even if you do R, you should have ALL financial aspects (credit cards, bank accounts, loans, vehicles) 100% separate.
Just my $0.02 worth.
Me: 43 M: 10y S:15 ILYBINILWY 2/18/13 W moved out 2/18/13 Filed for D: 2/17/13 Got DB: 2/20/13 Got DR: 2/23/13 180 & LRT Began: 2/25/13 D Final Dec '13
