Keep on keeping on Lisa. You're doing well in all of this and you never know when the fog will lift and a corner will be turned.
Sometimes things seem worst right before improving.
Me: 34 W:33 T: 10 M: 6 S: 6 D: 5 BD: 5/14 Still together(ish) Not giving up: 7/14 D talk has slowed, a lot. Gradually working on things together. Still separate bedrooms. Slow and Steady wins the race.