Settlement will be signed soon. Need advice.

[NewB3]

So confused and when I got home she was interested in the house as I have looked at. It felt awkward and I told her that and she said I didn't have to talk to her about it.
I then felt bad for excluding her as I know she likes homes. So I showed her a few. It made me feel really strange and I told her that and she said I don't have to show her anything she sorry she doesn't need to stress me out I was literally sweating. I then asked her if she was interested in the house or actually cared where I was going to live. Looking back I know I was just trying to get some feeling out of her because there seems to be nine this feels like a business transaction and now that all the paperwork is done as I've said before the "logistics" we can get down to the therapy session and being friends. I then proceeded to have some sort of a panic attack and started noticing things and saying things about the house. I didn't call myself down and had to go back and apologize and explain that I was under a tremendous amount of stress and that I was physically sweating sitting there showing her houses. She then said I understand. Which again made me think of a therapist and not a wife were caring person and I got irritated. I took a deep breath and looked at her and said I just want you to know I still love you. This is just awkward and stressful for me with everything I've got to do. She said aww, thanks for saying that. I've been told her that that was pretty crummy thing for you to say, just so in personal. Then replied with well what did you expect me to say the same thing back to you and I told her now I don't expect that I'm sorry forgive me it's stress I didn't shut my mouth and left.
I'm having confusing feelings about houses and her wanting to be friends and want to look at these things and give me her opinion and all of that because I know she's really trying I know she feels guilty or at least that's what my therapist said she's feeling guilty. Guilt is the reason she is being very talkative she's trying to be a little touchy and possibly the nudity think could be because she feels guilty for pulling away from me.
I don't even know anymore I'm tired of this I just kind of want to give up and go get a motel room and live there. I feel like I backslid 1,000,000 miles today by telling her that. I've been consistent with my one 80s and not saying I love you since the beginning of June. I just feel like crap. I really want the vets to weigh in here and shake me up and give me some pointers and point me in a direction that I can go. I am lost I need a guide.