Caliguy, I don't know what to say, except that from what I've read, coparents can't really go dark.
If you think your S would like to spend family time together, you could look at it as making this easier for him by going.
Be light, warm and breezy with her if you do go, right? Avoid R talk, focus on S... I mean, this is what you'd probably be doing if you were divorced, right?
Well ... going dark in the concept of not replying to anyhing that does not deal with our S ... thats about all I can do ... the exchanges are difficult with this ... she knows how to suck me in.
The S and I have a wonderful relationship .. he is happy when he is with me, and I have explained the new boundary I have set ... not telling him all ... but just that we can not be together right now because its not good for us at the moment, I want the family to be happy and not fake it any longer.
