He finally emailed about nine days ago. I have felt a lot better since receiving that email, in one sense, but it is making me rethink what I'm doing. I am considering taking Ss06's advice and going NC, but I haven't fully decided yet. His emails are chatty and friendly and he asks questions, he tells me about his life which is proceeding as normal (i.e. he hasn't made any other big changes, which he certainly needs to). I don't know. It frustrates me.
If I do decide to go NC, now would be a good time. This weekend he has the wedding of his best friend. He will know very few people at the wedding, and I know he doesn't have a plus one, so I feel like he might get a hint of loneliness, especially since he hates weddings. Following that, it is coming up to fall, and he always starts to get depressed by the weather. Finally, his bday is coming up which has been a BIG trigger for him for the last few years. I am hoping he'll start to see that his life won't change unless he changes it. That doesn't necessarily mean anything for our R. I just want him to realize that he has to put in some work if he wants to be happy.
As for that wedding, I sent his friend a message. Although she is HIS friend, she became my friend while me and my ex were together, and I am truly happy for her. It's been a long and difficult path for her to get to this point, so I just wished her a lifetime of happiness and left it at that. She thanked me and said "This means so much" and that was that. I'm glad I did it.
Now, I'm off to get a pedicure.. or at least, I would be if it EVER stopped raining! Feeling good today, despite everything, so trying to keep it up..
