My W should be making sure I get copies and if she won't I will need to contact the school to make sure my D gets two of everything so I can get copies!
No. She is not responsible for documents getting to you. You are responsible in reaching out to the school and inform them to include you in their mailings. It is up to you to determine how involved you want to be with D14's school, teachers and administrators.
Have you thought about calling the private school and explore options for D14? I know that private schools set aside scholarship/funds for students with low income to attend the school.
