Ask her for no-contact with other men, immediately. You BOTH have to make your improvements to build a more-worthy relationship. The way you recounted the convo, it sounds one-sided to me like she wants to keep you out there as "Plan B" while she makes no commitment to no-contact.
FEELINGS will take months -- sometimes even a year or two -- to fully return. But making the decision to not contact OM and OW and to work on self-improvements is just that -- a DECISION (and a commitment) -- that you both can make to each other.
