Michele has a really good article about forgiveness here. I find it helpful. You must really be so exhausted. I can't imagine having so many little kids running around and still having my sanity. My second (and last daughter) was incredibly colicky. I almost didn't survive it. The fact that you really are managing says much about you. I would let/make H help more. I know you want him to right his ship, but in the meantime, I would get all the help I could.
