Igit newbie needs help part 3

[igit]

I got a text from a freind who has a freind whose husband left her. She just finished D a few months ago. A beautiful lady. Model for a marriage magazine. GO figure. She knows of me and is keeping up with freind about my sitch. I guess the point is it kind of helps with detaching.although I know I can't act on it now, it's nice to know there is interest out there. It's like my m stinks and I am only one working on changing it.
I feel like w knows I am on a leash. All she has to do is give a little tug and puppy will come running back. But when the puppy breaks that leash she is going to come running after it. My W the other night said something to me. She said why don't you admit you never loved me. I was dumbfounded. Here I have stayed and fought for m going on 8 months. Pure hell. Sure did some dumb things, said some dumb things. I asked her if I never loved her what would I still be here for. Then she mentioned something about my being arugoaunt with my religion. I said if you don't think this sitch has humbled me andthat God hasn't humbled me I don't know what to tell you. It seems like she is almost angry because she can't believe what I have gone through and still hanging tough. Well I am actually feeling good about myself. Whatever path m R takes with w. I have learned so much about myself, my short falls. Strengths etc. I am glad to have been apart of DBing.