Went to church with the W and S .... seems she has been trying really hard to reconnect with S, buying him things .... can not say I care for that .... but glad she is trying to make their relationship better .... there is that side of me that did not mind her feeling guilty with how he was acting with her. After church she said they were hungry and asked if I was, so I suggested our go-to ... was a peaceful dinner, I was PMA, listening to her, I made it a point to end the dinner (One thing she seems to be beating me to, ending conversations) so I walked them to her car, opened her door for her (something I have been making a habit of doing since DBing) she said goodbye and I caught a glimpse of the girl I married ... went and ran an errand and went home. S called about an hour or so later to say goodnight and I let it go to voice mail as I was talking to my roomate about the Harley.
Today she is dropping him off, I am just doing chores, cleaning, laundry .... she says she is going to the spa with her long time friend ... I was happy to hear that, later tonight who knows what she will be up to ... I do find I am still struggling with OM ... some days its ok, others not .. I have not brought him up in a very long time thankfully .... the other thing I am really having a hard time with is after I am GAL'ing ... is the loneliness ... I miss just having my family around even as I am cleaning and doing chores ... its this alone time I fight the racing thoughts ... I pray one day this will end soon!
