Thank you pilot, 25 and others for your thoughtful and helpful words! All very true.
I am doing my best to GAL. I have a terrific social life, I'm taking a language class, I'm going on weekend trips, I'm looking for a new job and working on lots and lots of side projects. I'm definitely busy and having a good time. GAL is not too difficult for me as I was the "fun one" in the relationship, the one maintaining friendships and always planning activities.
I have a bit harder time with 180s and detaching. The main thing my H complained about at BD was that I was boring. Well, I am not boring. But I see what he meant in that we took the relationship for granted and we were lazy trying to maintain the passion and excitement. So my 180s (that would interest him) are being more mysterious and independent. I guess the way to convey this 180 is to be distant yet happy with my life.
Thanks to you all and MWD I have gotten great advice on how to do that. The only thing I need to do is put it into action on a day to day basis. Sometimes it's hard.
I hope everyone is having a great weekend! Hugs, Lisa
Me: 34 H: 30 M: 4 years BD: 6/15/14 He moved out 6/30/14 OW1: EA then PA after BD Now he's dating multiple OWs I'm over it and moving on.