Right now I am gradually letting go of hope. I don't pretend to have a crystal ball, so I'm not saying there's no hope. What hope tends to do is interfere with detachment, make me fearful and sad, and fixate me on things outside of my control.
When I let go of hope I feel more at peace. I can take care of myself, take care of my children, and focus on becoming the man I want to become. It seems that by accepting that my STBX may not look back I have been doing a bit better.
I still want to grow from my experience, and through that demonstrate 180s, validate her, etc. But I am doing that now more to grow stronger on my own and so I know that I wasn't the one that put the final nail in the coffin.
So please tell me. Is this a start towards detachment, or is there some benefit of remaining hopeful that I am missing out on?
Thank you all and goodnight.
Me:38 XW:38 T:11 years M:8 years Kids: S14, D11, D7 BD/Move out day: 6/17/14, D final Dec 15
