WAH - chapter 3

[pilot]

If I didn't 'play games' a bit then I would be showing up at his door in a trench coat and nothing else.

WTH. Why weren't you my wife? :P

As for your question of when your H says its over, and done, should you believe him. The answer is right now, yes. Right now, your H truly believes your M is over. That is why you are in the situation you are in. The catch is that in time, will that still be his belief? Someone posted that something like 80% give or take WAS end up with regrets in the future. Now if that is true or not, I have no idea. But I would not be surprised if many WAS who ended up D did not have regrets once they came out of their fog.

The trick for you Lisa is to have the patience to wait out the fog your husband is in. Now, you can do nothing and wait. You can mope and cry and wait, or you can work on yourself while you wait. The idea behind DB is to work on yourself and not necessarily wait, but not rush. In other words, accept the idea your H may truly leave you. So live your life as if he is. However, do nothing that will facilitate his leaving. The idea being is your H will want to rush to D right after BD. Since these things naturally take time, many WAS begin to have natural second thoughts, and become less in a rush. If you work on yourself in a way that your H notices and contradicts his negatives about you, he begins to think that maybe you really are not as bad as he has built you up. As his fog lifts he realizes that you really are an awesome catch and realizes the error of his ways, and wants to work to get YOU back.

Of course, that is how it is SUPPOSED to work. Every situation is different. My guess is that your H will have second thoughts at some point. You are still relatively new to this. And I KNOW that stinks to hear because to you it seems like an eternity already, and you want something to happen soon. So your best course of action to keep you from watching the clock is to go GAL. Do something else besides dwell on your H and what he is doing. Otherwise it is like watching a pot of water waiting for it to boil, and keeping your hand in it at the same time. Slow and painful!